On the enormous Japanese 2channel BBS, the largest web discussion forum in existence, there is a catchphrase known in English as the Yoshinoya Rant. It is a copy-pasted text post (known as kopipe ) whose use is seen when one poster wishes to convey his derision for another by mocking him and asserting that he is but a hapless Newbie who should stop posting. The Yoshinoya Rant, originally in Japanese, has been translated by 2channelers into English (multiple times), and is often posted to online communities as a humorous jab.

It is commonly seen on the 4chan imageboard network, and can be sometimes seen on Slashdot as well.

=English Text of the Yoshinoya Rant=

The most commonly seen version of the Yoshinoya rant is as follows:

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. Not that it s really related to this thread. I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn t get in. Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had 150 yen off written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You, don t come to Yoshinoya just because it s 150 yen off, fool. It s only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud. There re even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh How fucking nice. Alright, daddy s gonna order the extra-large. God I can t bear to watch. You people, I ll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats. Yoshinoya should be a bloody place. That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time, The stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that s what s great about this place. Women and children should screw off and stay home. Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes extra-large, with extra sauce. Who in the world orders extra sauce nowadays, you moron I want to ask him, do you REALLY want to eat it with extra sauce I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour. Are you sure you don t just want to try saying extra sauce Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green onion. That s right, extra green onion. This is the vet s way of eating. Extra green onion means more green onion than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key. And then, it s delicious. This is unbeatable. However, if you order this then there is danger that you ll be marked by the employees from next time on; it s a double-edged sword. I can t recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today s special.

==Analysis==

Note that in this example, >>1 refers to the Original Poster of the thread in question. In this case, it can be used to effectively say, You have created a worthless thread and are littering this forum with garbage. I am better than you, and you should lurk more until you can learn not to post shitty threads. However, >>1 can be replaced with the victim s name or even another numbered post.

The main focus of the humor in the Yoshinoya rant is that it tells a completely irrelevant story about one man s struggle with dealing with less-knowledgeable people all around him (see BOFH) and also uses tough-guy language to evoke feelings which would deter younger, less battle-hardened forum posters from posting until they lurked for a sufficient amount of time to get what was going on in the forum.

This is also not a perfect translation of the original Yoshinoya rant, however it is the most commonly seen one. There are other translations which exist, mostly posted to 2channel s English board.

=Derivatives=

The Yoshinoya rant can be used as the basis for many similarly-themed flames. An example follows:

==Slashdot==

Anyways, , please listen to me. Not that it s really related to this thread. I installed Windows XP a while ago; you know, Windows XP Well anyways there were an insane number of preloading applications built in there, and I couldn t log in. Then, I looked at the back of the box, and it had Now with Service Pack 2 written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You, don t install Windows just because it s got Service Pack 2, fool. It s only Service Pack 2, THE SECOND OF MULTIPLE SERVICE PACKS for crying out loud. There re even companies buying it. Company of 4000 employess, all ghosting images of Windows on their boxes, huh How fucking nice. Alright, Norton s gonna send a 20 GB image over the wire. God I can t bear to watch. You people, I ll give you a damn CD of Service Pack 2 for FREE if you stop jumping on this bandwagon. Windows should be an OS stained with the blood of Microsoft s corporate conquests. That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the Open-Source battle can start a fight at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that s what s great about this place. Small businesses and K-12 school districts should screw off and stay home. Anyways, I was about to wipe the drive, and then the bastard beside me goes Express install, with the firewall. Who in the world installs the Windows Firewall nowadays, you moron I want to ask him, do you REALLY want to install that firewall I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour. Are you sure you don t just want to try saying ICMP Coming from a Windows veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, third-party applications. That s right, third-party applications. This is the vet s way of computing. Third-pary applications means more functionality than security. But on the other hand the stability is a tad lower. This is the key. And then, it s powerful. This is unbeatable. However, if you try this then there is danger that you ll be marked by Microsoft s authorization during Windows Update from next time on; it s a double-edged sword. I can t recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, , should just stick with Mac OS 7.

==Afghanistan==

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. Not that it s really related to this thread, though. I went to Afganistan a while ago. Yeah, THAT Afganistan. Well anyways there was an insane number of mass communications there so I couldn t commence an attack. Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had Al-Kaida or something written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You don t come to Afganistan just because it s war, morons. It s just war. W-A-R for crying out loud. There re even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Afganistan, huh How fucking nice. Alright, daddy s gonna drop em some food. God I can t bear to watch. You people, America will do everything from there now on, so fucking clean this land of yourselves. Afganistan should be a more bloody place. That tense atmosphere, when a fight with the guy on opposite seat who recites the Coran can be started at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that s what s great about this place. Women and children should screw off and stay home. Anyways, just when I finally calmed down, the next bastard beside me goes let s betray Northern Alliance, shall we That just pissed me off even more. Who in the world deserts army and betrays, you moron What does let s betray Northern Alliance have this fucking proud face of yours I want to ask him this, do you REALLY want to betray I want to interrogate him. I want to fucking interrogate him for an hour. Isn t it that you just wanted to try saying NATO Coming from a Afgan veteran such as myself, the latest trend in Afganistan nowadays is of course this: self-exploding terrorism. Anthrax and self-exploding terrorism. That s what you should ask for normally. Self-exploding is praised after death. But on the other hand there s not enough satisfaction in the bereaved family. This is the key. And then there s anthrax. This is the most of all. However, if you order this then there is danger that you ll be marked by the UN from next time on; it s a double-edged sword. I can t recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with Ramadan.

=Original Japanese=

>>1

150

150 150150

150

>>

=External Links=